Just Because it Looks Good, Doesn’t Mean it Looks Good Enough to Eat

I really have nothing of value to add today but I just have to get this out.

I don’t care how cool the cake looks. You might as well just make the whole thing out of play-doh because fondant is a waste of cake.

It’s not a good texture. Not a good flavor.

It peels off the cake like that loose skin after you pop a blister. It ain’t right.

Also, I have to ask, is anyone else totally skeeved out watching them work with fondant on those cake decorating shows? Because they are all just working it, rolling it around in their bare hands and then just putting it on the cake…

I mean at least bread gets baked after you knead it. But they just… put it on the cake. I realize they must wash their hands, but they really dig into it. Really stuffing their fingers into it.

I do not trust these people to thoroughly clean out their fingernails. Call me paranoid. I just don’t.

No. Just, no. Put some goddamn delicious whipped icing on that cake with a sanitary utensil you don’t also use to scratch your ass. For the love of God–does the cake really need to look like a full-scale reproduction of Michaelangelo’s David? Does it really?

In the end… it all comes out looking like the same old shit anyway.


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